diffucult

i feel like i am blowing this completely out of proportion, this hair thing. Its so difficult. my pillow had hair all over it this morning, I have been picking stray pieces all day, i scratched my head and got a handful of hair. I try not to touch it. I'm told that this is where people usually shave it all off. I can't. I can't do that. I don't even know if i can cut it shorter. I feel terrible. People are much sicker than me and all I can do is whine about losing my hair and whine about myself whining about losing my hair.

I have a secret: I am afraid to go to bed. I am afraid I will wake up with a big bald spot on the back of my head. I wish i could sleep sitting up. Or flat on my face. Or suspended in the air. Hanging like a bat.

I wonder if slashes get more slanty when they are italicized. It would make sense if they were because the letters get more slanty. but then would it be too slanty? //
//

It seems it does get more slanty.

i made a necklace out of 2 t-shirts today. Then i used the leftover of one and third shirt to make a dress. i like doing that.

i should sleep.
i'm hungry and lonely. I have begun to enjoy the solitude of day now that i don't feel terrible, but i get lonely at night.
i'm going to try sleeping on my face.